“Love Language” by Divya Chhotani
Author’s Note: Whether you're swiping through your for you page or scrolling through Instagram you may have come across the phrase "love language". One's love language is based on how you express love to other people. The five different love languages are words of affirmation, physical touch, receiving gifts, quality time, & acts of service. For example, my love language is mainly words of affirmation which means that the best way that I feel loved is whenever people motivate me or give me a comment or tell me how much they admire me and I also enjoy quality time with people so that enhances our friendship/relationships. It's important to note that you need to be cognizant that you love someone in their love language and not yours which is important since you are your own person. Whether you're single or not, Valentine's day can be a hard day for people. Take care of one another and love the people around you. Love your significant other, show your appreciation for your parents and maybe do a "Galentine's Day" with your best friends. This is the first time that I'm spending Valentine's Day with someone and I couldn't be more excited to give my significant other their gifts and give gifts to the closest people in my life and my "Galentine's". This piece is something that speaks to me with components that are outside of my comfort zone, being vulnerable and talking about spirituality, sexuality, the idea of finding love and trying to find the "right one". If you're reading this I hope you know that it's okay not to have everything sorted out right now and it's okay if you're not in a relationship or not "talking to anyone" and to just take your time and not rush anything. Grow and figure out what you want and try new things you aren't going to get it right the first time or the second or even the third but let your heart be opened to love. If you've been in a relationship and have scars from it it's okay to take your time to heal and to figure out your priorities. It's okay to not be ready or to have that trauma but don't shut your heart down because the right one will come around and you deserve all the love in the entire world. you deserve to be loved and to be appreciated and remember that I love you. Thank you for reading :)
Love Language
oh how someone can crumble at three little words
melting in euphoria
a slippery slide of exhilaration
propelling me further into the abyss
I'm struggling to fill the void
I'd probably fling myself at anyone who shows the slightest attention to me
it's scary how someone can make you so happy
make you feel on top of the world
reaching great heights until the biggest fall
but before you even get on the ride you have the choice to even hop on
you don't really know what you're jumping into
a pit of snakes wishing for your demise
multiple eyes.
staring at your every move
judging and deducing your past self
forgotten demons following the new & changed you
you are like a snake
shedding your skin after every tragedy and growing a thicker one to prepare you for the fall
awaiting your demise
fighting for survival on the daily
your mind is your worst enemy
feeding you lies that cloud your judgment
second-guessing your existence and losing that one moment of euphoria
the moment that you fought for
the split second you saw their lips curl into a huge smile
the way they turn around after saying goodbye only to look back behind them to get the last glimpse of you
watching the way you carry yourself with grace and a little funky bounce
I like it when you smile because it warms my little heart
the way your eyes peer into mine, it's like you're trying to figure out my entire story
the sparkle, as cliche as it sounds, is something that makes the butterflies fly around
it's hard to contain inside of me
the excitement overtaking my every motion
we might not be perfect human beings at the end of the day
but after every single tragedy, we've risen and grown from the broken and scattered ashes
rising like phoenix's
spreading our wings and flying
but I hope you're willing to catch me when my wings give out
but I hope you're willing to hold me on those hard nights where I see no end in sight
but I hope you're willing to pull me in a little closer tonight
so show me your love language and teach me your ways
give me all of you and show me how I can love someone like you
show me what it feels like to be on cloud 9
show me what it feels like to be alive
sometimes I just want to let you be whenever I lose myself
I'm scared of projecting my emotions on a person who is so pure-hearted
paranoia darkening my night vision
I'm jaded
while I sit looking at life through a lens with no reflection
can I get a kiss or a peck on the cheek
can I feel your lips on mine one last time
I want you to wrap your arms around my body and feel how my body fits perfectly on yours and how my head fits so well rested on your neck
a little divine beauty
radiating gonna call you my sunshine or even my valentine
oh how you're so divine
the way you spread your legs and get ready for me to dive right in
swimming in your ocean or am I lucid dreaming at 5 am
trying to find you in my sheets when it's pitch dark and the bottle is empty
how I see you spinning in my headspace craving for your touch
begging you to call my phone and holding your hand and pulling you back into bed so that we can start a new day together
watch the sunrise and have a mimosa
watch the sunset and we go down in the sheets
can I swim in your ocean and feel how you feel on my body
my hands running up and down your body
goosebumps and late-night kisses
turning up the music higher and higher the more you put your lips all over my body
it's 4 am and I'm sitting with a pail by your side of the bed, collecting the tears that you shed from past pains
the pail overflowing as the salts mix with the stained steel
your eyes growing tired and your nose getting stuffy
I hand you tissues, I ain't lying when I tell you that you cry beautifully
a beautiful mess
lost and shattered
I try to pick up the broken pieces single-handedly
every
single
time
prioritizing people who wouldn't do the same for me
losing myself in the madness and chaos
trying to pinpoint where I went wrong
fading in and out of reality
my dream world turning into my best friend
because at least my thoughts don't have legs that can run away from a girl like me
my thoughts keep me secure, grounded a cord in the universe
mother earth blossoming my imagination
beauty like aphrodite
eating strawberries and chocolate, aphrodisiac potion
get some whipped cream and some ecstasy
feels like heaven when you're close to me
I can't tell if it's love or lust
well I think it's love but my past has taught me that even the devil can bring you to love
clouded in the smoke rings while you pick out your outfit for the next day
the way the ring's loop round and round like a vinyl playing on repeat
unable to comprehend my surroundings
fucked up thinking about you
Frank Ocean said "I thought that I was dreaming when you said you loved me"
but I thought that I was dreaming when you said you wanted me for me
no one ever told me such pretty lies like you
I'm sitting here wasted laying in my bed waiting for someone like you to come around again
waiting for someone to love me the way I deserve to be loved
falling in strangers beds looking for the meaning of life
it's like I'm trying to make meaning out of using comic sans when I should use Times New Roman
I'm looking for something unique
someone wholesome
who will love me more like adore me
fall in deep and excite me
I'll remind you every day how beautiful you are
the way my hand is on your cheek when I pull you in for a kiss
how you say the words I love you over and over again
I'm so in love with you
or am I in love with the idea of love?
the idea of you & I
I feel like all my grey cells are exploding in one instance
all my brain cells disintegrating into nothingness
beautiful white lies that form at the tip of your tongue
ready to hiss like a snake
pawing like a lion leaping at its prey
I'm begging for an escape
I seem to be aiming for the sky but I'm still scratching the surface
I seem to be aiming for the sky but I'm still scratching the surface
trying to find a love like yours
trying to find another you & I