Culture and IdentityHomeThe Creativity Issue

Cord Cutting for Hair Cutting

By March 15, 2019 72 Comments

By: Rochelle Sunglao

“You’re going to be poor, what kind of living will you make working at Supercuts?!?!”
That was a question my mom asked me 14 years ago, and the beginning of 6 months of being on the
receiving end of the cold shoulder.
Being the eldest daughter in a Filipino household, to say that there were unrealistic expectations of me
would be a gross understatement. My mother and I were often at odds with one another for a variety of
reasons at any given time in her life. I’m not the model daughter that she envisioned. I was a tomboy for
a large part of my childhood. I wasn’t “ladylike” enough. When I came into embracing my femininity the
color commentary shifted to, “Please don’t date, you should wait until after you finish college and get a
degree.”
Children of immigrants understand that our parents take the chances to move to a foreign place
because they want better for their families. Whether for the betterment of the family they left behind or
the family they create, the idea is simple. They want us to have opportunities they didn’t, in a land that
they think will provide an opportunity to thrive. My mom’s particular vision for what that meant was
something that didn’t fall in line with my own. It was this difference in our visions that created a period
of time that was miserable for our already combative relationship.
I walk this fine line of being left and right brained. I have gone through all my life with the abilities to be
a “model minority” and could be an excellent student. My passions, the things that made me excited
about life were always the humanities and arts. I often joke about not being “that kind of Asian”
because math and sciences didn’t click as easily as my ability to form thought in writing. To give my
brain breaks during my academic career it was things like cooking, sketching, journaling, and coloring in
coloring books that saved my mental health. Never, never ever would I have considered entering a
creative field because that’s not what was acceptable, or even worse, it wasn’t respectable.
Nearly 15 years ago, I had a life changing surgery. Afterwards I was in a bad way and wrestling with and
odd sense of loss. I had lost one ovary, one fallopian tube, and had gained this fear of possible cancer. I
was waiting on the results of a biopsy and I asked myself, “Am I going down a path to be the type of
parent I want to be?” Simply put, the answer was a resounding NO. I knew whatever move I made next
had to be thoughtful, intentional. I had to take more active control over my future and that meant
dismantling the expectations my parents had of me being their first child with a bachelor degree. During
my medical leave from school, I decided that I would return in fall and try again to see where I stood.
Fall semester came, and my efforts were half assed. I wasn’t proud of my performance, this wasn’t
meant for me anymore. I’m definitely more of a use your whole ass type of girl. Change was necessary. I
had to figure out what I could do to have the balance of being happy and fulfilled and give my future
self the opportunity to be the kind of mother I imagined myself being.
I know my mom loved me, and I appreciate the sacrifices made to gift me this amazing life of creation,
but there were times I remember wishing that she was at certain events or could be the one to pick me
up from school every day. I didn’t want any child of mine to feel those things if I could help it. I made a
decision and enrolled in the local Paul Mitchell school to pursue my cosmetology license. I would have a
trade that I could take anywhere. I would be able to make a living in a very flexible field. I saw so much
possibility for my future self and I was so happy the day I went into the admissions office because I was
taking control of my future for myself and my family. I thought I was doing something that was similar to
what my parents had done by immigrating to the United States.

Sounds wonderful right? It was, up until I informed my parents of what I had done. My mom took the
news as a tragedy. There was a lot of things said that day. Then after, she didn’t say anything to me. I
was ignored. It was like I didn’t exist. I was in this place of being torn between what felt right in my gut,
and desperately wanting approval for my choice. My mom would have loved for me to be a nurse. She
would have loved that I follow in her footsteps, be the image of the daughter she always imagined. The
thing is, I couldn’t be. It wasn’t who I was or meant to be.
After getting my cosmetology license, I went to work. I paid my dues as an assistant in a large salon
chain, and no, not Supercuts. I built a clientele. I was steadily growing. My mom saw that I was taking
this career path seriously and saw that I was happy in my work life. She started coming to the salon and
was in my chair as a client. She was beginning to see how I could thrive.
2011, in late February my mom passed away. The fear of cancer, the fear I had a few years prior, it was
her reality. By the time we knew it was eating away at her, it was too late. It was inoperable, chemo
wasn’t going to be good for her quality of life. She had very limited time to spend with her husband and
4 kids. We were facing death together. Both terrified. Both trying to be strong. My mom and I, we’re
very much the same. Crude sense of humor, extra AF in our style, dancers at heart, strong willed, and
stubborn, good grief are we stubborn. At that time we also didn’t realize we were both carrying around
a lot of guilt and shame for things past. I hate to admit this, but knowing that death was approaching,
that was what it took for us to heal each other and come to a place of deep understanding.
We put all our quarrels aside. We said that we loved each other. We were physically affectionate. I
wiped her ass and she said, “This is payback for me wiping your ass all those times.” I held her more
than all the previous years combined. Before she passed away peacefully in her sleep, one of the best
things she ever said to me was, “Thank goodness you didn’t end up at Supercuts and thank goodness
you’re not a nurse. You’d be mediocre at it.” In her own way, she was finally giving me the approval I
was seeking all those years ago.

Written in loving memory of Rosalina Capanzana Sunglao

Hair stylist, make up artist, alien, unicorn, weirdo. The many facets of who Rochelle is, can be expressed as whimsical and oddly unique. Creative endeavors have always been part of their journey and have afforded them wonderful opportunities. Explorations in entrepreneurship, published work for hair and makeup abilities, being a brand educator, and connecting to people in very personal and fulfilling ways are among the endless benefits of a career that’s over a decade long. Not surprisingly, writing is another expression that resonates deeply with them. Writing about human experience, connection, and hope have been their primary subjects. Even though we are all having our unique experiences, the ways we feel are not solitary. They hope to remind others that we are all made of stardust after all.

Find Rochelle here:

Instagram: @ro_rochelle_

72 Comments

  • I just want to say I am just new to blogging and absolutely loved this web page. More than likely I’m planning to bookmark your blog . You definitely come with wonderful stories. Bless you for sharing your website page.

  • W88Thai says:

    Very interesting points you have remarked, appreciate it for putting up. “Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” by Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi.

  • 릴 게임 says:

    Excellent post. I was checking constantly this blog and I’m impressed! Extremely helpful info particularly the last part 🙂 I care for such information a lot. I was looking for this certain info for a very long time. Thank you and best of luck.

  • Podcast says:

    Very interesting topic , appreciate it for posting . “Nothing is more wretched than the mind of a man conscious of guilt.” by Titus Maccius Plautus.

  • obviously like your website but you have to check the spelling on several of your posts. Several of them are rife with spelling problems and I to find it very bothersome to tell the reality on the other hand I¡¦ll surely come back again.

  • I’m really impressed with your writing skills as well as with the layout on your weblog. Is this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself? Anyway keep up the nice quality writing, it is rare to see a great blog like this one today..

  • Very interesting info !Perfect just what I was looking for! “Energy is the power that drives every human being. It is not lost by exertion by maintained by it.” by Germaine Greer.

  • What i don’t realize is actually how you are now not really a lot more well-preferred than you might be right now. You are very intelligent. You understand therefore significantly in terms of this matter, produced me in my opinion consider it from a lot of varied angles. Its like women and men don’t seem to be fascinated except it is one thing to do with Woman gaga! Your personal stuffs excellent. At all times care for it up!

  • W88 says:

    I have been reading out a few of your posts and i can claim pretty nice stuff. I will definitely bookmark your blog.

  • This website online is known as a walk-by way of for all of the information you needed about this and didn’t know who to ask. Glimpse right here, and you’ll definitely discover it.

  • I carry on listening to the news talk about getting free online grant applications so I have been looking around for the top site to get one. Could you advise me please, where could i get some?

  • sishair says:

    It is the best time to make some plans for the future and it’s time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I could I wish to suggest you some interesting things or suggestions. Perhaps you can write next articles referring to this article. I desire to read more things about it!

  • Nice blog here! Also your website loads up fast! What web host are you using? Can I get your affiliate link to your host? I wish my web site loaded up as fast as yours lol

  • I’ve learn a few good stuff here. Definitely value bookmarking for revisiting. I surprise how so much attempt you put to make such a excellent informative website.

  • I think this is among the most significant info for me. And i am glad reading your article. But want to remark on few general things, The website style is wonderful, the articles is really excellent : D. Good job, cheers

  • Great write-up, I¡¦m normal visitor of one¡¦s site, maintain up the nice operate, and It’s going to be a regular visitor for a lengthy time.

  • Whats Taking place i am new to this, I stumbled upon this I have discovered It positively helpful and it has helped me out loads. I hope to give a contribution & help different customers like its aided me. Great job.

  • Excellent blog here! Also your site loads up fast! What host are you using? Can I get your affiliate link to your host? I wish my site loaded up as quickly as yours lol

  • gambling says:

    I have recently started a site, the info you offer on this site has helped me greatly. Thanks for all of your time & work. “Yield not to evils, but attack all the more boldly.” by Virgil.

  • Kammerjäger says:

    I really like your writing style, fantastic information, appreciate it for posting :D. “Every moment of one’s existence one is growing into more or retreating into less.” by Norman Mailer.

  • You made some first rate points there. I appeared on the internet for the problem and located most individuals will go together with together with your website.

  • I was recommended this blog by my cousin. I’m not sure whether this post is written by him as nobody else know such detailed about my trouble. You’re wonderful! Thanks!

  • I like what you guys are up too. Such clever work and exposure! Keep up the excellent works guys I’ve incorporated you guys to blogroll.

  • I like this post, enjoyed this one thanks for posting .

  • beast IPTV says:

    I truly enjoy reading through on this site, it has excellent articles . “Sometime they’ll give a war and nobody will come.” by Carl Sandburg.

  • Thanks for your concepts. One thing I have noticed is banks plus financial institutions really know the spending behaviors of consumers and also understand that most of the people max out and about their real credit cards around the holiday seasons. They properly take advantage of this particular fact and commence flooding the inbox along with snail-mail box along with hundreds of no-interest APR credit cards offers just after the holiday season finishes. Knowing that when you are like 98% in the American open public, you’ll hop at the opportunity to consolidate financial debt and shift balances for 0 interest rates credit cards.

  • I appreciate, cause I found exactly what I was looking for. You’ve ended my four day long hunt! God Bless you man. Have a nice day. Bye

  • You are a very smart person!

  • curso seo says:

    Very interesting subject , thanks for putting up. “All human beings should try to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.” by James Thurber.

  • Wow, incredible blog structure! How lengthy have you been running a blog for? you make blogging glance easy. The full glance of your web site is great, as well as the content!

  • I like this post, enjoyed this one appreciate it for putting up.

  • Mute Davinci says:

    Hello! I just want to give an enormous thumbs up for the nice data you’ve right here on this post. I shall be coming again to your weblog for extra soon.

  • online poker says:

    I’ve been exploring for a little bit for any high-quality articles or blog posts on this kind of area . Exploring in Yahoo I at last stumbled upon this website. Reading this information So i’m happy to convey that I’ve an incredibly good uncanny feeling I discovered just what I needed. I most certainly will make sure to don’t forget this website and give it a glance on a constant basis.

  • Howdy! Do you know if they make any plugins to help with SEO? I’m trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords but I’m not seeing very good gains. If you know of any please share. Appreciate it!

  • My brother suggested I would possibly like this blog. He used to be totally right. This submit actually made my day. You cann’t believe simply how so much time I had spent for this info! Thanks!

  • I appreciate, cause I found just what I was looking for. You have ended my 4 day long hunt! God Bless you man. Have a great day. Bye

  • poker says:

    Superb blog! Do you have any suggestions for aspiring writers? I’m hoping to start my own blog soon but I’m a little lost on everything. Would you suggest starting with a free platform like WordPress or go for a paid option? There are so many options out there that I’m totally overwhelmed .. Any recommendations? Kudos!

  • Thanks for the points shared on your blog. Yet another thing I would like to express is that fat reduction is not information on going on a dietary fad and trying to shed as much weight as you’re able in a set period of time. The most effective way to lose weight naturally is by acquiring it slowly and following some basic points which can enable you to make the most from the attempt to lose fat. You may understand and already be following these tips, however reinforcing know-how never damages.

  • What’s Happening i am new to this, I stumbled upon this I’ve found It absolutely useful and it has aided me out loads. I hope to contribute & aid other users like its helped me. Great job.

  • You can definitely see your expertise in the work you write. The arena hopes for even more passionate writers such as you who aren’t afraid to say how they believe. All the time follow your heart. “History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.” by Napoleon.

  • Unquestionably believe that which you said. Your favorite reason appeared to be on the web the simplest thing to be aware of. I say to you, I certainly get annoyed while people think about worries that they just do not know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top and also defined out the whole thing without having side-effects , people could take a signal. Will probably be back to get more. Thanks

  • I truly enjoy reading through on this website , it has great blog posts. “Wealth and children are the adornment of life.” by Koran.

  • Yesterday, while I was at work, my cousin stole my iphone and tested to see if it can survive a twenty five foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation. My iPad is now broken and she has 83 views. I know this is completely off topic but I had to share it with someone!

  • poker says:

    Hello there! This is kind of off topic but I need some guidance from an established blog. Is it hard to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty quick. I’m thinking about creating my own but I’m not sure where to begin. Do you have any ideas or suggestions? With thanks

  • Fantastic web site. Lots of useful info here. I am sending it to several friends ans also sharing in delicious. And naturally, thanks for your sweat!

  • abnehmen says:

    Hi there very cool website!! Man .. Excellent .. Amazing .. I will bookmark your web site and take the feeds also…I’m glad to search out so many helpful info right here in the post, we need work out extra strategies in this regard, thanks for sharing.

  • Hey there! This post couldn’t be written any better! Reading this post reminds me of my good old room mate! He always kept chatting about this. I will forward this page to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!

  • Thank you for sharing superb informations. Your website is so cool. I’m impressed by the details that you’ve on this web site. It reveals how nicely you understand this subject. Bookmarked this web page, will come back for extra articles. You, my pal, ROCK! I found just the info I already searched everywhere and just could not come across. What an ideal web-site.

  • blancolån says:

    One more thing. I think that there are several travel insurance websites of reputable companies that permit you to enter your vacation details and find you the prices. You can also purchase the actual international travel insurance policy on the internet by using the credit card. Everything you should do should be to enter the travel information and you can understand the plans side-by-side. You only need to find the program that suits your finances and needs and after that use your credit card to buy the item. Travel insurance on the web is a good way to check for a trustworthy company pertaining to international holiday insurance. Thanks for expressing your ideas.

  • I have been exploring for a little for any high-quality articles or weblog posts in this sort of area . Exploring in Yahoo I at last stumbled upon this site. Studying this info So i’m satisfied to convey that I’ve a very good uncanny feeling I found out exactly what I needed. I such a lot without a doubt will make certain to do not disregard this site and provides it a look regularly.

  • Definitely, what a fantastic website and enlightening posts, I definitely will bookmark your blog.Best Regards!

  • It’s a pity you don’t have a donate button! I’d most certainly donate to this brilliant blog! I suppose for now i’ll settle for bookmarking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to fresh updates and will share this blog with my Facebook group. Chat soon!

  • Only a smiling visitor here to share the love (:, btw outstanding pattern .

  • fitness says:

    I have learned a few important things by means of your post. I might also like to express that there may be situation in which you will have a loan and do not need a co-signer such as a Fed Student Aid Loan. In case you are getting a loan through a conventional finance company then you need to be made ready to have a co-signer ready to assist you to. The lenders will probably base that decision over a few elements but the most significant will be your credit standing. There are some loan merchants that will in addition look at your job history and come to a decision based on that but in many instances it will be based on on your scores.

  • I was just looking for this info for some time. After six hours of continuous Googleing, finally I got it in your website. I wonder what’s the lack of Google strategy that don’t rank this type of informative web sites in top of the list. Generally the top websites are full of garbage.

  • Search Mp3 says:

    Good day very cool web site!! Man .. Excellent .. Superb .. I’ll bookmark your website and take the feeds also…I’m satisfied to search out numerous useful info right here in the submit, we’d like develop extra strategies in this regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .

  • Good write-up, I’m normal visitor of one’s blog, maintain up the nice operate, and It’s going to be a regular visitor for a lengthy time.

  • Hi there, I found your website via Google while searching for a related topic, your site came up, it looks good. I’ve bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.

  • Troy Koubek says:

    Wow, fantastic blog layout! How long have you been blogging for? you make blogging look easy. The overall look of your web site is wonderful, as well as the content!

  • You can certainly see your skills within the work you write. The world hopes for even more passionate writers like you who aren’t afraid to say how they believe. Always follow your heart. “Every man serves a useful purpose A miser, for example, makes a wonderful ancestor.” by Laurence J. Peter.

  • I’ll immediately snatch your rss as I can not to find your e-mail subscription link or e-newsletter service. Do you’ve any? Kindly let me realize so that I may subscribe. Thanks.

  • W88 says:

    I have been examinating out many of your stories and i can claim nice stuff. I will surely bookmark your website.

  • Dead written content material , appreciate it for information .

  • What i don’t understood is actually how you’re no longer actually a lot more well-liked than you might be now. You are very intelligent. You recognize thus considerably on the subject of this matter, made me individually believe it from so many various angles. Its like women and men don’t seem to be interested until it is one thing to do with Lady gaga! Your individual stuffs excellent. At all times take care of it up!

  • I gotta favorite this web site it seems extremely helpful invaluable

  • Thank you for sharing excellent informations. Your web site is so cool. I am impressed by the details that you’ve on this web site. It reveals how nicely you perceive this subject. Bookmarked this web page, will come back for extra articles. You, my pal, ROCK! I found just the information I already searched everywhere and simply could not come across. What a great site.

  • I really appreciate this post. I have been looking all over for this! Thank goodness I found it on Bing. You have made my day! Thanks again!

  • Onine Marketing Manager Wien

  • csm says:

    I will immediately grab your rss feed as I can not find your e-mail subscription link or newsletter service. Do you have any? Kindly let me know in order that I could subscribe. Thanks.

  • I dugg some of you post as I thought they were extremely helpful invaluable

  • Magnificent website. Plenty of helpful info here. I am sending it to several friends ans also sharing in delicious. And of course, thank you on your sweat!

  • Some truly superb info , Gladiola I detected this. “It is the customary fate of new truths to begin as heresies and to end as superstitions.” by Aldous Huxley.

Leave a Reply